Wednesday 4 March 2009

Setback no. 1734

I woke up early this morning shivering. Wow, what a cold morning. I dashed to the bathroom and back into bed. I could not get warm. I dithered, I got another blanket, I shivered.

Ray woke up and tried to warm me up with a cuddle. "Wow! You're burning up!" Temperature of 38.9c/ 102f. Yikes.

It took two duvets and two blankets and at about midday after snoozing on and off I felt my own heat and flung off a few covers.

I've seen my doctor today ("how are you?" Tears of course) who thinks that the coincidence of the hycosy scan followed by low belly pain and fever indicates an infection. Waaaaaa! On the other hand it might be a bug I've picked up along the way. *crosses fingers, hopes Ray get's it too*

But it is possible that because the fever had gone by the time we got to the doctors office (I still feel like crap) I might not need more antibiotics. I have a prescription, just in case.

Just when you thought things were improving.

We drove to a view point after my doctors visit to watch the rain and Ray started talking about his shock at the news from monday, how scared he is to try again, whether it's worth it if things might go wrong again, how would we deal with it, maybe we shouldn't but he wants to, but he couldn't stand to see me in such pain again, and round and round until he'd got all the thoughts out of his head. No conclusions, because there aren't any. We will be trying again, of course we will, we hope everything works out, but we're terrified, just like everyone else.

And now I'm going back to bed, I'll catch up with you all tomorrow.


  1. Oh honey, I'm so sorry! I hate being sick - it makes me cry :( I hope you feel better, and that you and Ray are able to keep talking and find some bit of peace.

  2. Do hope you feel better soon. I HATE being sick. Hugs and love.

  3. Oh Barbara, you're such a warrior. I'm hoping this is the end of nastiness for you. I have a rotten cold at the moment, and Simon just wont get it. If I'm sick, he should be sick too! I'm glad to be home reading your words again. Thinking of sweet George lots and lots and lots today.

  4. Thinking of you.
    Peace and hugs.

  5. I hope what ever it is passes quickly and you feel better soon.

    My husband says those same words. Its hard to watch a man in pain. I hope that Ray can come to terms with whatever it is he's feeling and thinking.

  6. Hope you feel better soon. I'm so glad can talk things through with you.

  7. I hope you feel better. Fevers really suck, make you feel just awful. Sorry you are sick.

  8. Aww, honey- keeping my fingers crossed for this to be just a nasty cold and not an infection.

    Feeling for (and with) you and Ray on this one. On doctor's orders, I just picked up prenatal vitamins (NOT pregnant, just preparing for TTC) and the chant started in my head- I want to, I'm scared, we can, we can't, what if we do, what if we don't? Who knew the grief roller coaster was right next to a merry-go-round? Look at us- we've landed right in the middle of a whole grief amusement park! Bleah!

    Hugs to you.

  9. Oh Sweets - that is just the most frustrating news! Damn evil infections...or bug cause either are evil in my book.

    Sleep well...let that sweet man of yours dote.

  10. Ugh...I hope the evil fever goes back to its den.

    Take rest. Get well soon.

  11. Feel better, honey.



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