Tuesday 17 March 2009


Another doctors appointment today, and yes, I cried again *sigh*. I'm going to try counselling again, with someone called Maria, at my doctors surgery this time. I have to wait until early April to see her so I guess she's good at what she does.

The appointment is at 8.30 in the morning. That might be fun. I haven't been up that early for quite a while. I wonder if I'll be coherent. If nothing else I would like to be able to talk to Dr Compassion without crying each time I see him and his sad puppydog eyes so I'm hoping to get all my crying done when I see Maria. Yeah right. I'm not sure if she has a second name.

Dr Compassion and I talked a little about getting pregnant. Not together you understand, he wasn't offering to help. He just said that lightning doesn't strike the same place twice; I didn't correct him on this but I hope he's right in my case. He gave me a new prescription for folic acid and he hopes I have good news by the time I see him again for a new sick note in a months time. I hope so too, but I doubt it will happen so quickly. This month will be our last chance to make a 2009 baby.

Now for the waiting, hoping, disappointment game. I don't want to play for too long.


  1. Good for you for trying counselling again, as I know it wasn't quite your cup of tea (Oh, wait- do the counsellors there make tea, too, or is it just the OBs?). Sounds like Dr compassion gave you a perscription for a healthy dose of optimism along with the folic acid. Sharing your hope that this game has just one round.

  2. I made the decision to start counseling again today also. Good luck to you - this journey can be a difficult one. Trying to conceive is not as easy as I always thought it would be. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you that this month will be your lucky month. xx

  3. Oh G.d. I so hear you on the last month thing! Please. Please. Please.
    Right at this very moment I'm on hold to the wonderful new Obs to make an appointment to find out WHY we haven't. But it's only month 3 I tell myself. But it's not fair, the other voice says. So I'm going with the other voice, it's not fair, and I will go and cry in the doctor's office too. I know that I will.


  4. "I talked a little about getting pregnant. Not together you understand, he wasn't offering to help."

    LOLOL at that!

    8:30 is really early. For counselling, would you be really vent up so early in the morning?

    I too hope that you do not have to play for long. All the very best!

  5. Sometimes games suck. And you have had to play yours for too long. I for one am praying and simply saying "please." Because for you, that word means a thousand sentences. xxxx

  6. we will all be here no matter what happens this month or the next or the next.


  7. Hi there

    Just found your blog and wanted to say 'hello' and I'm sorry for all you've been through.

    I hope the counselling helps.

    Look forward to reading more and getting to know you.

    Take care, N

  8. I am a bit childish when it comes to games. I only like to play if I win. Here's to you kicking the sh** out of the game and WINNING!!!!

    Oh, and you my friend are no crybaby!

    love and hugs, love and hugs.

  9. You posts always make me giggle. I hope Maria is up to the task. I also hope 2009 closes with a healthy baby in your arms.

  10. Unfortunately, the crying may last for a while... but I am sure the doctor understands. I am glad you've found someone to talk to about it though. For me I had some points where counseling really pulled me through.

    As for the next pregnancy, the truth is that statistics are on your side this time. The other truth is that statistics will never again be very comforting. You will probably face a lot of fear and concern if you decide to get pregnant again, but you will also have extra care from your doctors and no one will blame you for being super paranoid this time around.

    I wish you nothing but peace, no matter what else happens.

  11. I'm hoping with you, Barbara. Lots of love to you.

  12. I just found your blog and wanted to wish you positive vibes as you begin counseling.



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