Today we were walking by the harbour and I heard a girl calling to her brother, his name was George. I felt a catch in my chest and I had to see what this George looked like. This George was about 8. Did he look like my George? Of course not. Would our George have been balancing on the back of the boat trailer where it attaches to the car grinning at his own daring and cleverness as we pulled our boat up the slipway? Oh I'd very much to think so.
It was somewhat of a coincidence. Amy has been blogging about her feelings when coming across a new baby sharing her Liam's name. And working out how to find peace with it. My maternal Grandfather was George but I haven't met another George since we lost ours. It felt a little strange but it was ok.
Friends of ours (in England, actually) had a baby boy George right after I had Hope and right before you had your George. I have only seen one photo of him. I got a little choked up, and in fact I do each time I think of him. I wont ever think about him without thinking of your George. I don't hear of or see many Hopes around. But it does sting when I see or hear of a Lily. That was always going to be my Hope's name, and hearing being called out on the street, always brings a tear to my eye.ReplyDelete
Lots of love to you Barbara.
I imagine that was very strange. But so glad it was also okay.ReplyDelete
You've been on my mind lately, friend. Wishing good things for you.
Sophia is a pretty common name where we are. I hear mothers say it often. In fact there is a little Sophie in Emma's dance class whose name I hear every week. Ellie is less common, but I hear it too. Everytime it is like a little piece of my fractured heart breaks clean. Thinking of you and your sweet George. xxReplyDelete
My heart always skips a beat and my breath catches when I hear Nicholas' name. I remember when we were just 6 weeks out from losing Nicholas I heard his name in the airport... instant tears. Now, when I hear his name... it makes me smile.ReplyDelete
I'm glad to hear that the moment was "ok" for you. That's a big step.
Thinking of you and your George.
I like to think you had that encounter so George could say "Hi Mama". :)ReplyDelete
((Hugs)) and much love to you, Ray, and your beautiful George.ReplyDelete
I haven't heard anyone say "Cayden" yet but I can only imagine how it'd take my breath away. Sending love to you and your beautiful baby boy, George. xoReplyDelete
Thanks for sharing this.ReplyDelete
I have only heard the name and met one real live Liam (other than my own)once. I was teaching a school program and the child was in the class. He had his hand raised and when I went to call on him, I read his name tag and saw my son's name. I thought many of same things you mentioned: would my Liam look like this boy? Would he raise his hand willingly during a field trip?
I think of all my babylost friends and their little ones when a name comes up before I think of my friends and their live babies. I know many Owens - two angel babies, one live baby and a dog. I think of them nearly simutaniosly, but the angelbabies always come up first.
I am glad that this queer sensation that you had about hearing your boy's namesake's name...was so gentle overall.ReplyDelete
All the best, B!
Before Akul was born, I blogged his name and watched you tube videos with Akuls in it. Now I do not have the strength to do so. I really miss my Akul.ReplyDelete
Like Amy, I think I would have a tough time hearing of another baby with the same name as my sons. It would probably hit me like a ton of bricks. I loved my sons names, I am sadnened by the fact that they aren't names I can call out every day. I just make sure to say their names over and over when we are visiting them...more so for me i'm sure.ReplyDelete
PS...This is my first time here, your son is beautiful. I lost my son E at 21w1d. I am off to read your story, its one I wish wasn't even here to read.ReplyDelete
"Would our George have been balancing on the back of the boat trailer where it attaches to the car grinning at his own daring and cleverness as we pulled our boat up the slipway? Oh I'd very much to think so."ReplyDelete
What a lovely thought!
I swear one day I heard my ex-husband talk about someone else named Toren but he never told me that he met someone with the same name as our dead son so I wondered if I imagined it. Real or mis-heard, it totally took my breath away.
It is always odd to hear YOUR baby's name spoken around you but with no connection to you.ReplyDelete
I've become good at hearing it, except this year when a new girl named Emma joined Comedian's preschool. That felt like too much - Emma with her all day, everyday, but not.
Every time I hear the name George spoken, or read it anywhere, I think of your son and send loving thoughts your way.ReplyDelete
i didn't think that Leila (or Layla/Laila/Leyla) was a very common name, but i seem to Hear it often now. i've only come into actual contact with two though, once when i was still pregnant at a restaurant, and that brought a happy smile to my face, and then again on friday, when i photographed a little girl at the elementary school i was working, and that brought a sad smile to my face. i'm surprised i didn't choke up. and even though i heard eric clapton's Layla allll the time while i was pregnant, i never hear it anymore... odd.ReplyDelete
thinking of George <3