Wednesday 23 September 2009

I think I have finally lost it.

Yeah, as if you've never thought I had lost it before?

This evening I was making salad and pulling leaves off a solid round red lettuce (more like a red cabbage) and suddenly, in my hand I was holding this thing that was exactly the same size as George's head. What? No, seriously, WHAT??? My mind does the most bizarre things to me sometimes, honestly. I put it down, took a deep breath and attended to the tomatoes which fortunately did not resemble any part of my son's anatomy.

I went for my monthly, "Hi, how are you, ready to look for work yet? No, ok, fill in this form." appointment this afternoon and was chatting about trying to get pregnant, or rather listening to my adviser chatting about their receptionist who had been trying to get pregnant for ages, had several miscarriages, and now has pre-eclampsia and has to have a c-section next week. The first time I went into that place I was faced with this seemingly glowingly healthy, obviously pregnant, radiantly happy receptionist and I'll admit that I had a hard time sitting there waiting without thinking at least once, "You have no idea...". Of course she had no idea about me; and I had no idea about her.

You just never know do you?

Oh, and then I went to get my machete sharpened.


  1. Nope, you never do.
    Thinking of you Barb and sending much love.

  2. My mind has played bizarre tricks on aren't crazy...well, if you are then I am too, and I'd say we're in good company.

    You're in my thoughts and I'm sending love and hugs to you!


  3. Sigh. It is amazing what tricks our minds play, no?

  4. I think we like to hope that other women don't know our pain and that may be why we think they look so happily pregnant. xx

  5. My internet connection doesn't like your blog. I tried to post twice on your last entry and my connection quit each time when I hit "publish comment" :(

    So, today I'm just sending (((HUUUGSS)))

  6. Every life has a story...Thank God we do not know them all.

  7. you are not crazy. or maybe we both are! this used to happen to me all the time - lots of stuff, but especially food, looked like her. triggered memories of her. i don't know why. for myself, it may be a touch of PTSD - qualifies as flashbacks, right? anyway, you are not alone on that one. xo



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