Thursday 23 June 2011

I am angry

Angry, so angry that our son is missing out on his life.

Angry that our Little Poppet never had a chance.

Angry that we have no living children and want them so very badly.

Angry at the process that is destroying my father from within himself.

Angry that my Mother has to watch.

Angry that my brother doesn't seem to think that we are doing enough.

Angry at the torment that Ray has been enduring with his ears.

Anger at my powerlessness. 

Angry that it has taken me so long to feel this anger.

And now that's off my chest it's already dissipating. Mostly.

Thank you for "listening".


  1. oh Barb. I am feeling this post. I hope writing it down helped a little. Sometimes voicing it does. But mostly, I'm angry with you, and I am sorry that you, and Ray and the people you love are in pain.

  2. Let it out, that's why we're here! Hugs.

  3. I am so sorry, but I am glad you got a vent. That's the problem with these kinds of things, it is ALWAYS there and until something resolves, it just builds like a volcano.


  4. I feel your rage. And it is all very well justified. I'm full of rage at all those things for you.
    And I'm so sorry. And I wish I could "fix" things.
    Or bring you tea and cake, at the very least.

  5. I'm here, "listening" and wishing there was more I could do. Sending love.

  6. Your anger is justified, B. Why does your brother think you are not doing enough? It does not appear like that to me at all.

    I am sorry, B.

  7. So healthy to let it out and something I know I can relate to. Feel better and be kind to yourself as only you can~

  8. ((((hugs)))) Let it out. Anger is understandable and given all you are dealing with. I understand. I'm angry too. Angry and tired.

  9. So much to be angry about. It's good to get it out. My not make the anger to away, but I really think it helps keep it from taking such firm root. Here to listen for the good and the bad.

  10. always listening, Barb.... love to you

  11. Oh, boy- I hear you, and am angry right along with you for all that is not as it should be. Always here- for all of it.

  12. Anonymous said... Barb, its been so long since I've been online visiting blogs but I wanted to pop by to see how you were doing and to let you know I think of you so often.
    I wish there was something more I could do to make all that is wrong right. I hope it offers you even just a modicum of comfort to know that I hold you and Ray and George and Little Poppet in my heart, always. This morning I noticed his hydragea is staring to bloom again. There are more blooms than last year. I'm waiting to see what colour they will be.



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