This was George's year.
The year of joy and sorrow.
The year I learned about real love and real pain.
The year of love for Ray and love for our unborn baby.
The year of such great joy at making George and such incredibly deep deep sorrow at his loss.
The year Ray and I became parents and grew SO much closer through our loss.
The year that the worst thing in the world happened.
The year I found out what it was like to be a mother to a dead baby.
The year I found out there was no such thing as fair.
The year I found kindred spirits in you beautiful people out there who know.
The year my light went out but now flickers uncertainly.
The year that I changed.
I know that one day passing into another year won't take away the pain of grief but I'm hoping that things will keep getting better.
Today I think I'm going to be ok. Tomorrow might be different.