Escape plans

We're finally going away - on 4th October - only 3 weeks to go we have to wait nearly 3 more weeks!  Arranged carefully to avoid periods, carpet laying and decorating. Yes, I know, the universe laughs in the face of careful plans, hoped for sunshine and indeed, babies. It's an act of faith.

We're staying near Rye in Sussex. A seaside town which lost the sea. We're staying in a caravan. It was stupidly cheap and we get many more nights for our money than staying in hotels (I was planning on fancy-shmancy hotels but the miser in me won out). I haven't stayed in a caravan since I was little and I sort of hope it rains just for the noise on the roof. We're going to an area that is flat and marshy, wide and wild. Big skies, long beaches, sand dunes and lots of history. Names like Frenchman's beach, Ypres tower, Wish street, Cinque Ports street and Mermaid street intrigue me. And then there's Dungeness which I think will suit my mood and maybe help blow away a few cobwebs.

I've been desperate to get away since we lost Little P.

I need to get away from the blanket of gloom that has settled about me. The one so heavy and itchy and uncomfortable that it stopped me from getting myself an in-real-life hug.

If I could just leave it behind... or better still, drop it along the way...

Ray has an ulcer. Probably. Unpleasant tests. I worry. He stresses.

But we're not cancelling this holiday for anything.