I'm a very bad patient

Unless you put me in a hospital, poke my insides out, hook me up to a couple of bags of blood, a saline drip and possibly a narcotic of some kind and in that case, no no, I'm fine, really, it's ok, you go home, it doesn't hurt too much, I'm good, no thank you, just some water you go and get some rest.

But put me on the sofa with a snotty drippy nose, a woolly head and an irritatingly tickly cough and you can expect moaning and groaning of the finest order. Ooooaaaaah sniffle ohhhhhhh sneeze ooooowwwwwww coughcoughcoughcoughcoughcoughcoughcough ugggggggggh coughcoughcoughwheeze. Poppppettttt I neeeed a cup of tea, daaaarliiiing will you cook dinner tonight and tomorrow coughcoughcoughcough can I have some honey and lemon pleeeeease.

Hopeless.