Yesterdays post was odd for me (too). I haven't really relived that time in all it's glorious technicolour detail before. Just the odd flashes in long gone nightmares.
Maybe it was time to let go of the trauma of the whole thing. Maybe it's taken a year to process. Maybe it was about admitting the possibility that maybe I could have died from the blood loss. Maybe I just wanted to show off to you how crappy it was. Yeah, I know. We all had it crappy. It doesn't come much crappier than losing your child. There is no crappy+.
Whatever.
Enough.
I miss my boy every day but I don't need to torture myself (or you) with the traumatic details any more.
And just to prove that I am really quite ok: An amusing kittehpic.
Uuhhm... you're not the only one having flashbacks ya know...
I seem to remember there's a little something of mine missing... down there... no?
I seem to remember there's a little something of mine missing... down there... no?
Barb,
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you had a safe place to get those memories out. So much for you and Ray to carry for a year. We (and I!) are always here to listen to anything you have to share. Hope both you and the kitties are feeling better today.
xxx
That's quiet a camera angle there, with that kitty-crotch shot. ;-)
ReplyDeleteI don't think there is anything wrong with venting when you need to. This blog is your space, and as much as I would like to think we can turn a switch off to our trauma, I don't know that it's possible. Maybe most days will be that way for you, I pray they are, but on those few where you are back there in that hospital, don't feel afraid to put out there what you are feeling.
ReplyDeleteNow, as for kitty... that brought a smile to my face this morning.
Crappy+, no kidding, it's hard to experience anything worse than a dead baby.
ReplyDeleteI sometimes need to tell gory details too, it helps to get those bad memories out there for some reason. So no worries if you need to talk about the trauma you have been through.
(((hugs)))
My cat sits like that all the time, except he has black patches, so looks like a panda bear!
ReplyDeleteI think your experience was very traumatic, and that bloodloss is actually separate from losing George. That trauma is something to be vented.
Love the picture. Just letting it all (or what's left) hang out!
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Vent away, Barb. That's what we're here for. The happy bits, the sad bits and the traumatic bits. We'll always listen.
ReplyDeleteAnd erm.... love the kitteh porn!
Nothing wrong with expressing the trauma of what you went through Barb, it's part of your experience. As for the kitteh, well it's just too darn cute, even in that come hither pose....LOL
ReplyDeletecrappy+. ain't that the truth.
ReplyDeleteThis is the best place to vent...don't hesitate here.
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